Archive for the 'Geek' Category

Locked to the Table, part 2

Wednesday, January 31st, 2007

Thank you for contacting Targus Customer Support.

I apologize for the inconvenience caused. Please find the cutiing [sic] instructions attached.

Thank you for your interest in our products. We appreciate your business and look forward to assisting you in the future.

[...]

Step 1: Obtain a hacksaw from a hardware store or similar location.

[...]

Other Matt: Such as … a hacksaw vendor?

To be continued…

Moronic problems can solved by moronic actions.

Tuesday, January 30th, 2007

I’m telecommuting from campus between classes. I’m cautious; I lock my laptop to a clunky but futuristic space-table with ethernet orbs in the lab while I work there, so I can escape to the restroom to de-Nalgify myself at regular intervals.

1:45 PM: It’s time to shut down for class – first quiz in 15 minutes. As Notes cogitates on responding to the exit command, I calmly rotate the lock tumbler until my old and trusted combination shows, and press the button. Nothing happens. I check the combination. I scramble it, and reset it: 1242. Nothing. I’ve used this combination for seven years; it’s not wrong. The button won’t depress: my work-owned machine is stuck to a table in a semi-public lab. What are my options?

Leave it here, and come back after the quiz? That leaves me with the same problem, minus the time constraint. Run to a hardware store, and hope that nobody accuses me of stealing my own laptop when I come back with bolt cutters stuffed under my coat? But even after the inevitable conversation with UAPD, that wouldn’t solve the problem of the lock still being attached to the laptop, even if it would be free from the cable.

Maybe I can contort the cable into a shape that will stretch around the table and off? No, I’m not such a moron that I would lock my laptop to something that isn’t big enough to make it impossible to remove. Or am I?

Yes.

It turns out that I am. And in this case, it worked mightily to my advantage.

The quiz was easy. Now about this laptop on a metal lasso …

hanged lappy

The New English

Wednesday, January 24th, 2007

Dr. Neumann, on networking interrupts:

“This is just what we do in class when we raise our hands: we’re making an asynchronous, out-of-band service request to arbitrate the communication channel with frequency-division multiplexing.”

And it was a useful analogy, because it made perfect sense. That seems to be the difference between geek-speak and corporate-speak, because I just got a memo about integrating and aligning sector requirements with competency trends and strategic plans as part of a multi-pronged approach to enable client affinity, and I have no clue what that means.

On Education and Acronyms

Sunday, January 21st, 2007

Ever have a terrible instructor and later find out that you actually learned quite a lot from him? Things come back more easily than you might expect, but I still wouldn’t want that experience again – the grad version is excellent. (caution: inside jokes.)

Anyway, it’s time for some irreverent comments from Panko’s Business Data Networks and Telecommunications book (not that I’m procrastinating):

On battles over standards between the IETF, ISO, and ITU-T: In 1992, IETF member Dave Clark summarized the situation this way: “We reject kings, presidents, and voting. We believe in rough consensus and running code.”

On acronyms: OSI is the ‘Reference Model of Open Systems Interconnection’ … in any case, OSI is rarely spelled out, which is merciful.

But having started on acronyms, I have to mention my favorite, as documented by Mike Cowlishaw in the IBM Jargon and General Computing Dictionary: GOCB. Here’s how it breaks down:
G: GTMOSI (General Teleprocessing Monitor for OSI – two levels)
O: OSD (OSI Session Driver – three levels!)
C: Control
B: Block
This yields: General Teleprocessing Monitor for Open Systems Interconnection Open Systems Interconnection Session Driver Control Block (and that’s being easy and leaving out the Reference Model part). But that was obvious, right?

125,000 words

Friday, January 12th, 2007

I’m back, and I’ve finally set up Gallery. Here are three weeks of my life in photos:

Boulder
New York
Washington, D.C.

Enjoy!

Chez ‘rents

Saturday, December 16th, 2006

It’s good to get a reminder every now and then why I don’t use Windows. I thought a fresh install & update of XP from a service pack 2 disc would be quick. Lesson learned:

winupdate

Lesson 2, the Pyrex they’re selling these days ain’t yo grand-momma’s Pyrex:

pyrex

No meals were harmed in the making of this photograph (it was already done cooking).